How many times have you woken up and immediately checked your phone? An hour later, you’ve probably seen holiday photos, gym selfies, and supermodels in designer outfits. By the time you’re ready to start your day, it’s easy to feel dissatisfied with your own life or body. This feeling isn’t just a coincidence; it’s rooted in psychology. Social comparison theory explains why we continually compare ourselves to others on social media, and how these comparisons can have a significant impact on our self-esteem and body image.
What is Social Comparison Theory?
In 1954, a psychologist named Leon Festinger first proposed social comparison theory as a way to understand how we evaluate our self-worth (Festinger, 1954). He explained that people who feel uncertain of their self-worth may look at others for guidance. Doing this means we measure ourselves against unrealistic expectations of what is considered attractive, successful, or even healthy. A very common way to fall into this comparison trap is by scrolling social media and admiring the lives of people we don’t even know. In fact, it has been scientifically proven that people with easier access to social media platforms tend to have poorer self-esteem (Vogel et al., 2014). What’s interesting, though, is that social comparison can present in two different ways.
Types of Social Comparison
Upward Social Comparison
This type of comparison is when we compare ourselves to someone we think is ‘better off’ than us. Upward social comparison is especially common in cases of body image and eating habits, often leaving us feeling like we are not attractive enough or that we somehow fall short (Morrison et al., 2004). This is what happens, for example, when we compare what we eat in a day to What I Eat in a Day videos where we feel the person is more ‘disciplined’ or ‘healthier’ than we are, or our algorithm sends video after video of exercises to grow your glutes preformed by people with ‘perfectly’ round peaches that we don’t believe we have. Not only that, but research has shown that people who engage more frequently in upward comparison are more likely to have feelings of envy, guilt, regret, and unmet cravings (White et al., 2006). Today, social media makes it easier than ever before to compare ourselves to others, even though what we may see could be filtered, curated, or completely fake. A great example is watching fitness influencer workout videos or watching a day-in-the-life vlog of someone who wakes up at 4:00 AM to start their day. This type of content can easily make us feel like we are not measuring up.
Downward Social Comparison
In contrast, downward social comparison involves comparing ourselves to someone who may have lesser qualities or skills than we do. This type of comparison is mainly used to boost our self-esteem and make us feel better about where we are in life. For example, watching videos of people eating a lot of fast food may make you feel better about what you ate that day. However, this brief boost of confidence does not always last and can leave us constantly seeking reassurance by comparing ourselves to those who seem ‘worse off.’
The Impact of Social Media on Body Image and Well-Being
As mentioned earlier, many things we see on social media are curated and edited to ‘perfection.’ If we use this type of content as a blueprint for how we should live our lives, we can get trapped in a never-ending cycle of chasing an ideal that has always been impossible to reach. In doing so, we can start to experience disordered eating and body dissatisfaction while trying to live up to unrealistic beauty or health expectations (Aparicio-Martinez et al., 2019). For example, research shows that continuous scrolling and exposure to fitspiration and clean-eating posts increases levels of compulsive exercise and body-ideal internalization (Wu et al., 2022). While this content may be seen as inspiring or ‘healthy,’ it can actually encourage unhelpful habits and problematic comparison to others. Breaking free from social media’s expectations (and engaging in online comparison) is the first step toward gaining our confidence back and redefining what health and happiness mean to us.
Let’s Rethink Health and Well-Being
Maybe it is time for us to rethink what ‘healthy’ really means. True health isn’t about strict dieting mixed with never-ending cardio for days on end. We need to think about all aspects of well-being and what satisfies us mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. In other words, we need to start focusing on how our bodies feel ratherthan how they look. That might mean moving our bodies in ways that feel joyful instead of punishing, eating to nourish instead of restricting, and showing ourselves compassion when we don’t feel our best. Using this holistic mindset, we can begin to feel at peace with our lives and our bodies and stop comparing ourselves to others.
Taking Back Your Relationship with Your Body
It’s important to remember that social media is not the enemy; it’s all about how we choose to engage with it. By being more intentional about what we consume, when we consume, and how we consume, we can build and maintain a healthier relationship with our bodies. Here are a few tips you can try:
- Stay mindful of what you are consuming and how it makes you feel
- Follow creators promoting authenticity
- Remind yourself that social media is made to look perfect
- Set time boundaries for yourself to avoid mindless scrolling
- Take a break from social media altogether to help rebuild confidence and self-esteem
From Comparison to Compassion
It’s in our human nature to look for validation by comparing ourselves to others and assessing how we are doing in life. Nowadays, social media makes it easy to compare ourselves with edited and picture-perfect content on a deeper level than we have ever seen before. But constantly comparing ourselves harms our overall well-being. The good news is that we have the power to take control. Let’s start by being more intentional about how we engage with social media, and reclaim our relationship with our bodies. Shifting your focus from comparison to compassion will help you prioritize how you feel instead of how you look, nurturing balance, confidence, and self-acceptance. Most importantly, remember to be kind to yourself! Celebrate small accomplishments, honour your body, and focus on the things that truly bring you joy.
